Needing Him to Validate Who You Are...

Throughout life you here about some women who can never seem to go without a boyfriend because they don't feel whole or like themselves without one.  The reason they may feel this way is because they think that a man defines who they are and validates their being. What they don't understand is that no one has to validate who you are but you.

Throughout life a woman has to take the time to find out who she is as a person, her likes and dislikes, figuring out her future, appreciating her inner beauty as well as her outer beauty amongst other things.  If these simple things are not accomplished because you can't take the time out from always having a man on your arm then you are missing out on becoming your own person. Simply doing these things will help a woman to know who she is as a person and this in turn will build confidence in knowing what she wants out of life. These aspects are also very beneficial to a relationship as it will cause less stress on your man.  Having your significant other trying to help you figure or validate who you are as a person takes away from the beneficial factor of a relationship which is learning and growing together. 

All in all there is nothing wrong with having a boyfriend but only for the right reasons. If you are simply with someone because they distract you from finding out who you are then maybe it's time to take a step back. 

Finding out who you are as a person is one of the joyous parts of life.

Stay Fab!

Breast Cancer Awareness Month...How To Perform Breast Self-Exam Video...

In honor of Breast Cancer Awareness month, I want to make sure all my fab ones know how to conduct a breast self exam.  Please check out this short but very detailed video below.

Stay Fab!

Are You The Back Up?

While watching the new episode of New Girl (hilarious by the way,) I had to ask this question to my ladies. In this episode, Nick wants to make his ex girlfriend jealous and prove that he has moved on (although he hasn't completely,) so he and his roommate Jess come up with a plan to act like boyfriend and girlfriend to prove this. Now of course his ex Caroline (not pictured above,) falls for the bate and mid episode starts flirting with Nick and throwing innuendos out there to see if she has a chance to get back in there if things didn't work out with her current boyfriend and of course Nick proved her to be right. 

Now that I gave you a synopsis ladies, ask yourselves, are you a back up?  Have you and a significant other ever broken up and you have tried to move on but haven't completely yet and that ex seems to keep coming back at a vulnerable time?  Then there is a great chance you could be the back up plan.

This can totally suck but it is a reality, especially if the person you are dealing with is a selfish one. This person may want to hold on to you because either you were that great of a girlfriend and just in case it doesn't work out with the new person they know that your door will always be open.  Second, they may just be that selfish and don't want to see you with anyone else so if they know that you still have feelings for them they will lead you on while they are out there sowing their oats.

Ladies,  don't get yourself sucked into this world of foolishness because it will just lead to a world of headaches, heartache and unnecessary drama.  If the person that is using you as their back up plan can't man up and be with you completely (if that's what you want of course,) then he isn't worth your time. 

Stay Fab!

Next: Can You Really Change Your Partner?

Are You Smart or Oblivious When It Comes to Your Money?

Ladies are you being smart and frugal about your money or just letting it go freely like no body's business?  If you are being frugal then kudos to you but if you are letting it go freely it's time to come back in to reality.

Studies have shown that women can be more detail oriented when it comes to large goals like buying a house or traveling for instance but that point can become mute if all your money is going towards keeping up with the minor non important things.  The small things can consist of keeping up with the latest fashion and beauty trends,  having girls night out every week, eating out often, buying your pet every new outfit you see, so on and so forth.

Indulging into these things all the time are a big no-no because before you know it you have spent all your pennies and have nothing to put towards your bigger goals.  You have to ask yourself, "Do I need that new purse," "Do I really need to try out the new hairstyle of the season," "I want to hang out with the girls but do we have to go out every week, can't we make it two nights in?" You get my point ladies.  Just small changes in the way you treat your money will make a world of difference.  You have to always remember to separate your needs from your wants, when you do this you will notice that most of the things you spend money on are more wants then needs.

A site that has helped me become more frugal is http://www.mint.com/, which is a financial site for women so take a look as I believe it will help you as much as it has helped me.

It's time to become more detailed oriented ladies, aim for those bigger goals and set up a budget for yourself.  You can still enjoy life but you don't have to brake your bank to do so. 

Stay Fab!

What to Buy In October and Save

Don't Forget to Treat Yourself...

This past weekend I decided to get my eyebrows done as I had been doing them myself for a while and they were just to starting to look quite unsexy, lol.  This is something I use to do often but had stopped as I was trying to save money, amongst other things due to upcoming obligations. 

Well hubby and mom made sure to point out that I work hard and treating myself to a little something I so deserve is not a big deal.  Also, due to the fact that I obviously didn't know what the hell I was doing, but they tried to point that out in a subtle way, lol.  I actually listened and decided to treat myself this weekend even though it was something small it felt good. I thought about how many women do the same thing and put themselves on the back burner to take care of everything else. 

Now I'm not saying to break the bank but remember to always treat yourself to something even if it's small because you are just important as anything or anyone else.

On a side note, my eyebrows did come out fly. :)

Stay Fab!

Time to Stop Comparing Yourself...

Ladies, many of us including myself have done this in the past where we feel the need to compare our bodies to another. This is a very bad habit as it will lead you to self loathing and no matter how good you may look to others you will never feel good enough because you are constantly comparing yourself to another.

As I have gotten older I have become very comfortable in my skin and love every part of my body and I love to inspire other women to do the same.  Who cares if your boobs are not as big as hers, your stomach not as tight as hers, your legs not as thin or curvy as hers, your butt not as big or small as hers, so on and so forth.  When you look in the mirror you should love who you are and love the way God has made you as we are all meant to be unique.  If God wanted us all to look the same he would have done so.  Instead of comparing yourself to another say something to yourself like, "She has a nice body but so do I, I eat right, exercise and this is how my body is intended to be." Get into the habit of saying this to yourself because it will help you to start feeling good on the inside and it will shine through on the out. 

All women are beautiful in their own way and once you start to realize this it will make for a better you.

Stay Fab!

Next: Fabulous Benefits of Journal Writing

Fabulous Discussion...Light Racial Humor or Blatant Racism?

I was very excited about this new TV show "2 Broke Girls" on CBS as I am a fan of Kat Dennings (on your left) work and I figured if she is on this show it will be funny. I was also impressed by the preview so I thought why not give it a shot. 

I watched the pilot which was decent but by the second episode I was completely unimpressed with the ethnic and racial "humor" of the show. Don't get me wrong, I'm not little Ms. Sensitive as I laugh at racial humor just like the next person if it's done properly and in a tasteful way. Unfortunately, it seemed that this show took it too far and that's why I had to sit back and ask myself, "Is this show racist?

This question was asked because I was thinking there is no way writers can be this ignorant but I guess I was wrong.  For instance, with lines like, "You can't tell an Asian he made a mistake, he'll go in the back and throw himself on a sword," "Three blocks and fifteen ‘Hola, chica!’s away from my apartment."  WTH, is what I was thinking when I heard these lines and this was just two lines out of many in one episode but I believe you get the point. I understand pushing the envelope in television makes for good TV but what some writers have to understand is that racial humor can be a very touchy subject if it's not done in a funny and tasteful manner.  These lines were not funny and very distasteful, not a good combo at all. 

Are the writers just going for comedic humor or are they showing how they really feel and just hiding behind the pen while doing so?  Your thoughts ladies.

Stay Fab!